Loving Someone That Isn’t Meant to Stay
It’s been so hard.
There are many different aspects to foster care. So much you can learn and read about in training, but on the other hand, there’s just as much that you cannot ever prepare yourselves for. No matter how good your heart is, sometimes it’s just really hard. I think any foster parent will agree with me on that.
I can’t imagine being a mom and for whatever reason being unable to care for my child. Sometimes a string of bad choices and pain leads a mom down a daunting road. Sometimes she is in a place where she knows she cannot provide the life and necessities her child needs. I still believe somewhere in her heart, that she cares for her child. My heart breaks thinking that she is split from them. Unable to hear babbles, see first steps, take photos of a kindergarten graduation, or even teach him or her how to drive a car.
I didn’t realize how quickly I would love. To be honest, this was one of the main reasons why I was hesitant to pursue foster care in the first place. I was afraid of my heart getting broken. In my vulnerability, I realize the selfish ambition I carried. My first tendency was to think about myself, not someone else.
As we’ve gone further in this new endeavor, I’ve come to terms with the fact that it’s not about me. It’s not about my comfort, it’s about meeting the needs of a child for a season. Think about Jesus and how often he gave what he had to and for others. I want my life to speak the love of Jesus to those whom I come into contact with. It involves sacrifice and rearranging my plans and my comforts, but I can say it’s worth it.
No matter how long a foster kiddo is in our home, there is a level of attachment. Love has been given and received. Memories have been created. Laundry has been done. Little socks have been folded. Food has been picked up off the floor. Toys have been gathered up more than once. It’s a bittersweet moment watching them leave.
I’m learning there will be moments along the way that need to be grieved. And just as many moments to cherish. There have already been and will be more sacrifices in the future. But I can say it’s already been a blessing. We’ve learned so much and grieved a little along the way.
Sometimes God brings people into our lives for a season. It’s during those times that our lives can be changed for the better. It’s like they tiptoe in, gently rearrange pieces of our lives, and tiptoe ever so quietly to the next stage of their journey. For this adventure, and all of life, I want to love like Jesus. I’m going to love like crazy, even if they aren’t meant to stay forever.
Philippians 2:3-4
Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.
